Devon and Discipline

I remember this one time when Devon was about two and a half. We were staying with my parents. Having left Joel, I did the stereotypical thing and went home. Anyway, my mom and I were talking near her computer in the dining room. Devon walked in, climbed up on the table and got himself an apple. He didn't eat the apple. Instead, he started throwing it. I scolded him, and my mom scolded him, and I told him that nice boys don't play with food. But he just thought it was funny. Finally I told him that if he did it again he would get a spanking. Well, he did it again. And right as I said his name in my menacing mommy tone, Spencer got home from school and walked into the room. Without missing a beat Devon stood up, put on his best indignant look, pointed at Spencer and declared "Him did." I then had to tell him that not only do nice boys not play with food, but they also don't lie. Needless to say, Devon, and not 'him' got the spanking. Poor little guy, he started bawling his little eyes out and ran to me for comfort. Suzanne was less consoling. She did a funny dance around him, pointed at him and said "suckah, suckah you got spanked!" And he instantly quieted down. I don't know if it was in shame for the mocking, or out of confusion, but he quit crying.
Another time, after Devon and I had moved into our apartment, Dan was over. He was taking a nap or something. For some reason he was asleep (on the couch). And Devon was pestering him, and climbing on him, and gabbing to him. Dan was less than half awake and just wanted to sleep, so he said the first thing that came into his not-at-all coherent head "if you don't be quiet I'm going to throw you through a wall" then promptly went back to sleep (I have been instructed that I must ammend this entry since I have gotten tow quotes wrong, and also Dan wants to be sure that everyone knows that he was loking). I was in the kitchen making lunch when Devon runs up to me wailing "him......him.....wall....boo-boo" He then pointed in Dan's direction and pulled my by the arm towards him.
Yet another time, we were all over at Sara and Justin's house. Me and Dan wanted to visit the grown-ups, and Devon was super stoked to see Em-ma. Well, I was vising with Sara in one of the front rooms, when Devon came wailing down the hall crying "him.....him......him" and buried his head in my lap. Behind him came Justin looking bewildered and almost like he was scared I was going to yell at him. Turns out, the kiddos had been playing in the curtains, even though they had both been told several times not to, and Justin told them "no" in a firm voice. It took everything I had to put on my stern mommy face and explain to Devon that Justin was right to tell him no, and that he had been naughty. All the while Devon was sniffling, pointing to Justin and saying "him....sniffle.....sniffle....him"
The hardest part about our shared custody arrangement was that at the beginning of each week Devon was a wild man, totally out of control. And it took most of the week to get him back to normal. So when we went to go see Em-ma toward the beginning of the week, it was a trial. He would take a toy out of her hand, or push her down and he would get sent to time-out. Now for Devon, a spank was nothing. But time-out was a fate worse than death. He would cry and cry and cry and cry. And Emma, more often than not, would go up to him in time-out with a toy or a book or something, give it to him, and sometimes pat his little leg. Like she was saying, "hey, it's okay. This isn't that big a deal, if you want it take it. But cheer up" I have to say, Sara you have one heck of a little girl. And after time-out, they would go back to being best buddies and playing nice. Most of the time. After all, they were toddlers.