Sunday, November 30, 2008

Thanksgiving Day Fun!

In case you couldn't tell, I love getting shots of my little guy and his "big yawns" also, "big stretches". Whenever I notice him yawning or stretching, I comment on how big it is. But I think I take it too far because last week Dan yawned, and I exclaimed (in a voice usually reserved for Nate) "Wow, big yawns for Daddy" and Nathan wasn't even in the room.
Our Thanksgiving morning started out at Grandpa Adams's house (it's crazy to me that when I say that now, I'm talking about my dad instead of his dad. Love you Grandpa, and we miss you too). Lilly and Nate were all buckled up, ready to go. Dad had them sitting on the table, and he was playing with and rocking them both simultaneously.

This sweet boy, making his debut on my blog is Hunter Adams. He was born on September 28th, 2008. Making him 2 days younger than Madi and 16 days older than Nate. Isn't he a cutie?


Daddies and their babies. I love seeing daddies and their babies.

Aunt Tina and Nate. She and I were actually pregnant at the same time. Her little boy Connor is about 5 months younger than Devon was. And she was the only one who was impressed that I kept my pregnancy a secret. (mainly cause she didn't want to tell anyone about her own!)

Mikaila.....I can't believe she's almost a teenager. I remember her in diapers. One of my first memories of her is from when her little sister was born. Tina, Mike, Mikaila and the new baby, Leslie lived in an apartment in Mesa, and Mikaila was only a year and a half old. She and her sisters were so precious and soooo freaking cute when they were little. I remember when she was so shy it took most of Saturday each family campout to get her to talk to me or give me a hug without running to her mom. And now, she's holding my baby, and about to turn into a teenager!
Here's sweet baby Hunter again, with his mommy, Megan. That messes with me more than anything else. She's about Suzanne's age, but I saw Suzanne a lot more than Megan, so I've come to terms with her growing up (kind of). But Megan I still see as my little cousin, so it really trips me out to see her with her own sweet little boy. I keep thinking she's way too young, but then it hits me that she's the same age I was when Devon was born.


From left to right: Connor (sweet, funny little guy with an insane amount of energy-seriously I'm getting tired just remembering how much he was running, and playing and bouncing off the walls-and a very active imagination; Leslie (still can't get over how much she's grown. She's a big help to Grandma, she had a hand in making the rolls, turkey, stuffing and potatoes for dinner), Me and Nate, and Mikaila. Sometimes, when I don't want to face the fact that the girls are growing up, I close my eyes, imagine younger versions of them, and ignore all the pictures I have of them at their current age. It works, but the next time I do see them, it's a HUGE shock. And I ask who they are, and cover my ears, chanting "it's not them, they're so much younger."

My little family with Grandma Adams. I've got to say, I LOVE my Grandma Adams. She married Grandpa when my dad was 16 years old, and spent many many happy years with him. And she's been my grandma my whole life. I remember her Pillsbury dough boy figurines. She would let me play with them sometimes, and that was always special to me. She's also the person I can call randomly for a recipe for zucchini bread, or for "really soft sugar cookies that call for cream of tartar in the recipe....you know what I'm talking about, right Grandma?" She's the person I called, from Illinois to find out the difference between liquid and powdered pectin, and she didn't hardly even laugh when I told her I was canning peaches on the other side of the country. (at 9pm)
This year, the biggest thing I found myself giving thanks for was my family.
Dan, you amaze me. You patiently listen to me tell you the same stories for the 587,890,356th time. You are an amazing father. Just like you were before. And I know that you love both of the boys the same. And I don't know if you realize how grateful I am that you saw Devon as an added bonus, instead of someone you had to take, if you wanted me. I'm grateful that you have been here for me through all the craziness of last year. And that you had patience with me through my insanity during the pregnancy. I know I wasn't exactly the easiest person to be around at times. I am thankful for you, and for our roles within our family, but I'm also grateful to you for the way you remind me that even outside our parental roles, you still love me, not only as your children's mother, but also-and more importantly-as your wife.
Nate, I can't believe how incredibly lucky I am to not only know you, but to be your mommy too. Though I sometimes get scared that you're going to be like your big brother, I do my best to treasure everything you do. I love you so much, and I love your tiny laugh....heh, heh, heh (it's the deepest sound you make! and it's so sweet). Just looking at you, makes my heart melt, and I am so grateful that Heavenly Father trusted me enough to send you to me. Because I watch you, and I know that you are a very special little boy. Thank you for coming to live with us, and for helping to fill a spot in my heart that's been hurting.
Dad-I never really appreciated how much you do for me, or how you've always been there. But looking back, I see the sacrifices you made for me, and for our family. You are an awesome example to me of the kind of parent that I want to be for my own children, and I'm sorry that I took you for granted for so many years.
Suzanne-you have been through a lot, and come out stronger for it. I know that I can count on you to do anything you can for me. I appreciate that. I know that without your willingness to watch Devon, I would have had a lot more trouble than I did, and I know that you're also willing to take care of Nate if I ask. Or to volunteer. I love you, and I'm glad you're my sister.
Spencer-Hey dorkus, I love you, and you make me laugh. hard. a lot! Seriously though, you're a good kiddo, and you've always had a generous nature. I remember when you were 5 or 6, you had saved up some money and used it to buy a present for Mom. Don't worry though, I won't tell any of your friends.
Mom-I met the woman I call my Mom when I was 14, and I was interested in her son. Mom, I love you so much. I don't know if you really understand how grateful I am for everything you've done for me over the years, and for all that you've been to me. Even back then I was closer to you than I was to my own mother. And that day you saw me crying in an IHOP, two years after breaking your son's heart, you called me over, bought me breakfast and listened to my go on about my troubles with my husband, and held my son in your lap. You are such an amazing person, and I have always felt loved by you. I am so grateful to you for helping Dan. Everyone else told him to be careful, and that it was probably best to forget about me, because I had hurt him so badly. You were the one who told him to go for it. You saw that we loved each other, and that we needed each other. And you understand why a certain someone can still make me cry. And when I feel like crap, totally worthless, you make me see how special I am. You've been able to make me feel like I have value as a person since I was a teenager. I love you.
Sara-I am grateful for the friendship that I have with you. Whether we're comparing notes on our kids (or husbands), shopping, swapping recipe ideas, or gossiping about wack-a-doodles I always love talking to you. Sometimes I laugh at your craziness (like cloth diapers, even Ryan thought that one was funny). I miss you so much. I wish we could see you guys more often, but for now I guess I'll have to settle for talking to you on the phone every day or two.
Kami-You're like another sister to me. I think that your testimony is amazing, and you help support me sometimes. Your faith is so strong, and so solid, and no matter what crazy crap is going on, you can usually see the eternal perspective. I've been trying to follow your example lately, and I've been so much happier for it. You're also a lot of fun to hang out with. Ah, the glories of Ross and Nordstrom's sales. And pedicures. If not for you and Sara, there's no way I ever would have tried that one.
Cristi-I am very appreciative of the special relationship we've shared over the years. Looking back, I can't help but laugh at all the stuff we did. Like the "smurf" incident that Valentine's Day I had a date with your brother. And the time I came to you with 3 different colors in my hair. Or the time we got that crazy idea that we were going to make church dresses for each of your nieces! We hadn't even finished your dress (I still have to put the sleeves on, if I can find it). Our friendship is going on a decade old, and it has been filled with fun, laughter, and a few incredibly dumb things that seemed like a good thing at the time.
This is getting long, and I've made myself cry. So to wrap things up, I'm also grateful for a kind and loving Heavenly Father who trusted me with another of his choice spirit children, in spite of what happened. Jesus Christ who died for my sins so that I can live forever with my husband and our children. The holy scriptures that help me to know how I can be a better person, and how live according to God's will, and they make good bedtime reading, Nate already enjoys scripture time. I'm grateful for my own health, and my healthy family. I'm thankful for my job-it's not a fun job, but it allows me to provide for my family, and it provides really good insurance that has helped us a lot this year. And I'm thankful for the three years that I got to spend with a very special little boy who taught me so much about love, and looking out for/taking care of the ones we love. He saved my life when I was headed down a very bad path; if not for my son, I would not be where I am today. And I am grateful for my memory. It's selective, so I remember good, and happy times like they happened yesterday, while the painful memories fade away.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

who does Nate look like?

Deep in thought, Nathan asked me, "Mommy, who do I look like?"


" Do I look like my big brother?"


"Take a good look, do I look like Devon?


"Or like my cousin Jack"
"Maybe I look like cousin Madi"
"or Lilly"
"Mommy, do I look like Uncle Spencer? Please tell me I don't look as dorky as Uncle Spencer."



I'm not quite sure sweetie, but we'll find out.

1: I'll put up a poll to see what everybody thinks.

2: As far as mommy and daddy go, this nifty tool can tell us. According to the look-alike meter, you look equally like Mommy and Daddy. And according to Mommy and Daddy, you are loved equally by us both too.

Anderson Look-alike Meter

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Family search - Free family tree

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Family fun


Do you see what I put up with? My husband take up his half of the bed, and my 6 week old son takes up my half. Where am I supposed to sleep???



He gets away with it because he's just so darn cute :)



I LOVE to see Dan holding and loving and cuddling and snuggling with Nathan. It just melts my heart.

See what I mean?



This is from our family trip to the Riparian Preserve at Water Ranch. It's this place in Gilbert where they use reclaimed city waste water to create different habitats, and they treat the water and can use it again...I think. Anyway, it's very educational. There's trails (short, the two we went on were under a quarter mile each) with signs and plaques filled with learning. It's basically like a nature walk in the middle of Gilbert. I had fun, but then again, I'm kind of a nerd like that. Nate didn't get much of an experience, but there's also a playground, and an "excavation site" (a huge sandbox where kiddos can dig up fake bones) Not to mention the carious critters. we saw a bunch of birds, there's a pond with ducks (also for urban fishing), we saw a bunny, and there was a herd of cats.





The reason we came was Dan had to for a biology assignment. That part sucked because the professor's "detailed, step-by-step" map/directions of the area and where to find the info needed for the worksheet was totally off. We ended up having to retrace our steps on both paths, almost to the beginning. But on the plus side we got lots of exercise.


Nate was exhausted. sitting in a stroller really takes a lot out of a guy



So, that's what we've been up to. Luckily for us, Grampa Adams is taking a Biology class too. The cool thing is that Grampa needs to go to the zoo for his homework, so we'll probably come along to help him out.
We'll have lots more pictures of that trip too. And Thanksgiving. Nate is really looking forward to his first out-of-town trip. And he's going to get to meet Great Grandma Adams too! Like I said, I'll get pictures up as soon as I can. This pushy blonde keeps nagging me about it, and threatening me. I know I shouldn't give into terrorist demands, but she just never drops it. (Even though she hasn't posted new pictures all month...hypocrite!)

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Pizza Shenanigans


Well, as the title suggests, the topic of this rambling session is of the betrayal of the beloved food item, the pizza.
This evening, the wife and I decided that we were going to go to a favorite restaurant known as "Oreganos". The topic on my mind was that a person simply could do no better than a 10 inch, deep dish delight called "Numero Uno". So, I suggested it to my wife, and lo and behold we were off to the pizza palace.
First of all, if a person decides to go to a restaurant on a Saturday night, he/she seriously needs to get his/her head examined. The wait alone was 20-30 minutes, and if you have ever ordered a deep dish pizza at "Oreganos" (which I had), you would know that the time to cook the pizza will be roughly 40 minutes. Honestly, the entire endeavor took us nearly 2 hours to finish. Secondly, and much more importantly, the pizza itself has always tasted a little different to me, but I never had thought about it since it was sooooo good. Well, I convinced my wife to fore go her normal pasta garbage, for a manly (or I suppose in her case womanly), helping of Mid-Western goodness. Who was I to think that such a beloved friend of mine would end up being a caesarion Brutus, stabbing my family in the back. I mean, he was always such a pleasant pizza, granted very unhealthy, but reliable in the taste. I suppose that is why the shock of such a betrayal has hurt my wife and I so very much, because it truly is the person, or should I say pizza, you least expect. You see, as I was contentedly enjoying the company, and yes even the taste of my dear friend, my wife noticed something was a little different. Much like in a murder mystery where the inspector first notices that the woman in the red dress is holding something very sharp and dripping with something red, my wife noticed that this specific pizza was tasting a little different. "NAY" I exclaimed in sheer horror that my wife would accuse my friend of such an offense. "Nay, I say unto thee. My friend has always been honest and loyal. HOW DAREST THOU, accusing such an honest and true pizza. Was it not he that chased away the hunger that I once felt so deeply? Was it not he who dispelled all notions of mediocre '5 Dollar Pizza'? Surely you canst not deny the love it has for thee. Surely..." Well, deny she did, three times if I am not mistaken. For shame...
Well, even though I had a deep love for my friend, I could not deny my wife in pursuing her action, asking the waitress what is wrong with the crust of the pizza.
"Fermentation, it tastes like it doe." Rachel said (imagine a bad British accent). "I'm a bread conisure. I makes me bread, tastes me bread, and loves me bread. And THAT is an impostor." WHAT!?! A proverbial Duck in Bread's clothing!?! Well, the fine hostess explained that the pan was greased in a very fine layer of olive oil, and perchance that was what would be wrong. "MANAGER!" Rachel screamed! "MANAGER, GET ME THE MANAGER!"
Well, the poor manager ran as quickly as if a rabid dog had developed a taste for man blood (or meat) and was on his trail. Meekly, kneeling down, he bravely asked what could possibly be the matter. "Your dough is bewitched!" Rachel bellowed. "Bewitched I say! I tasted fermentation and I say its been BEWITCHED!"
The manager bent his head down, in almost a whisper said well that could be because of our secret ingredient.
Wait a minute, secret ingredient? It has a SECRET ingredient? What possible secrets could my beloved friend withhold from me, his nearest and dearest friend.
"We pour in just a hint of Bud Light..."
...
...
What?!?
What?!?!
WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
How could that be???
How could the pizza withhold such vital information???
No, it can't be...
Why?
Why!?!
WHY!?!
Why did it have to be HIM???
There were so many other pizzas with sub-par ingredients. How could it not tell me? Why would it do this?
I asked the Manager to please tell me it was not so...
This could not be happening. There was just no way that this could be real. A joke, yes he must be telling a joke! HA HA HA!!! What a fine jester he must be. But a joke it was not, and the truth was finally revealed. It was there, all those times I had held it. Bit it. Loved it...
It was evil.
At the core, it was evil...
The Bible teaches that Satan will tempt you with fine things, but THIS, THIS seemed too far.
Well, the sin dealer, aka Manager, did give us the pizza for free, but honestly what man would want it now. The truth was revealed. There was no way to deny it.
So, here I sit, typing out my pain. Is there no real love in the world? It feels as though my faith has been shaken.
As my wife has so aptly but "I feel betrayed. They lied to us. They used vile 'trickeration'."
I suppose all I have left now is my other love, Taco Bell, but the world seems, just a little bit darker...and...a little more lonely.
Some final advice, for those who believe that love still does exist, know who your eating. Know it well, and know it true because sometimes your world can be destroyed. Sometimes, the ones you love the most can attack suddenly striking at you in your nearest and dearest places, your heart (tear).
This is Pirate Dan signing off, Good Luck...

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I need an intervention!!

I've got problems. Not that it should be news to anyone. But seriously, I've got issues. Just ask my husband, he can tell you. I know that certain topics and certain situations will raise my blood pressure, anger me, get me all frazzled, hurt me, and may even make me cry. Yet in spite of my knowledge, I can't stop myself. I still call/email my mom. I still said hi to her when I saw her at the grocery store. I still blog surf to sites that raise my blood pressure and prompt calls to others to tell them what crazy stupid thing was posted lately. And lively discussion about said stupid craziness. When I know I'm being provoked by someone who just wants attention, even though I know that person's favorite type of attention os contentious attention, I still bite.
So it should come to no one's surprise that I was surfing the Internet and found myself on a site with a thread about the boycotting of Utah over prop 8...in CALIFORNIA. That just doesn't make sense to me. So I posted a coupe comments on their threads.

boycotts do work. Just ask Anita Bryant!
I agree, but why exactly do you want to boycott a state? As far as I can tell it's because members of a certain religion (note, members...people, individuals, not the church itself) were against a proposition in a different state. What exactly are you trying to prove here? By that logic, people should boycott Italy anytime Catholic people do something you don't like.

and....

80% of the money behind the campaign to ban people from getting married came from donations and orchestrated hatefulness by Mormons and the Church of LDS in Utah.
EDIT: 80% is disputable. It's
at least 48%, but this doesn't factor in small (>$1000) donations or donors who haven't been 'outed' as Mormons.
I would like to know where you're getting your statistics? After all, numbers are different all over the internet, and lots of other organizations, and even gasp other churches, such as the Catholics were in favor of the propostion passing. As for factoring in "small (>$1000) donations or donors who haven't been 'outed' as Mormons.", why should they be "outed"? I donated a small amount of money to Mitt Romney's and then to John McCain's campaigns. (not that it should matter, but I was baptized at St. Timmothy's Catholic Community, and attended Mass there from the time I was an infant to after graduation when I moved out of the area) And I did it because I wanted them to succeed, not because my religious leaders told me to.

I added the part in parenthesis because I wanted my point to be made without just being shut down immediately because I'm just one of the meddling, idiotic, rights crushing Mormons. And, technically, nothing I said is untrue. As I said earlier though, I need help. Because now, instead of getting some of sleep I so desperately need, my blood pressure is raised up super high, I'm too upset to get to bed, and I'm waiting another 6 minutes so that I can post another comment!
HELP!!!!

Yeah, so I have basically zero self control. Cause I posted again. In response to one particluarly, *ahem* passionate thread.
After two people agree that a boycott would affect all Utah, including those who didn't care one way or the other about California's propositions, and one person says the gays are being whiny and that's not going to get them rights. Another person, Malcontent, says the Mormons took gay rights away. One of the first two says that the voters did. Malcontent responds that Mormons helped. The first person replies so did the voters, and the California voters didn't want gays to be able to marry. So people who want gay marriage have to fight for their rights. This is what Malcontent took from that:

"So did the voters, you know, the ones who made the decision at the polls?"
OK.
"Voters in California don't want gays to be able to marry, by a slim margin."
OK.'
"People in favor of gay marriage now have to fight to get their right back, but they need to do it right, they can't sit back and point fingers at mormons."
Sure they can. You admitted that mormons helped


All he got out of that was that Mormons were out to get California, and he was right, and the first person backs him up!!! He goes on a little more colorfully:

I say let's (mess) those religious fundamentalist (people who love their moms) up. They need to take responsibility for their actions.
Once we are done with the mormons we can go down the list.
... the mormons. Who ... cares about them anyway?

That's right. And right after you get the Mormons, maybe we can abolish democracy and elections. After all, without registered voters in California, this never would have happened

Malcontent was very passionate. So, since this is a family friendly blog, I edited a bit. My way is nicer, but I'm sure that if you put the effort into it, you can figure out the true spirit, and wording of his post.

Monday, November 17, 2008

October Pictures

Miss Madilyn Dee Lines, on her first ever trip not only to Arizona, but her first trip to the wonderful world of Ross as well.
Grammy and Nate. I gotta tell you, Grammy's good. She got this little boy to not only settle down, but to fall asleep as well.

My sweet, sleep boy. Now tell me honestly, when was the last time you saw such a sweet, adorable little boy?

This was fun. Dan laid down, then got handed Madi and promptly placed her in the crook of his arm and cuddled her. To his dismay I thought it would be an adorable picture, so I plopped Nate down too and he was stuck like that for half an hour!

Grammy had a good time meeting Nate and getting to know him.

Even Suzanne joined in. When I told her Sara was in town, she got all excited and rushed over with Lilly.

That made Sara happy because she's been hounding me to put up more Lilly pics so she could see how much Lilly is growing. FYI, at her 4 month check up, she weighed in at an impressive 16 pounds!

Uncle Dan got to hold Baby Lilly too. Isn't she a sweet girl? I gotsta say, I love that little kiddo!

Jackson was being his usual, mischievous self. Poor guy had an infection in each ear!

Nate is sporting a cute, baby Spiderman onesie, with matching bootie socks. Goes to show that he inherited not only his daddy's good looks, but his love of Spidey as well.

Ah, Halloween. Daddy was a Vampire Ghoul, and Nate was the cutest baby pirate ever!


With eyeliner moustache! Ready to sail the seven seas. And pillage and loot every port from Port Royal to Tortuga. As long as he can nap on the way and he's home in time for Mommy to feed him and Daddy to put him to bed.

Mommy dressed up as Grandma Talahongva.....I mean, a witch. Not exactly like Grandma T. Mommy was a nice witch. Just kidding! (kind of) :)
Ok, so I had this big, long, well-typed out update on how we're all doing, but for some reason, my computer deleted it. So I'll be posting again soon with November pics, and Spencer's birthday. My baby brother turned 16 on Friday!!

A letter to Dan

Sweetheart,
I love you so much. And I'm sorry that things have been so crazy lately. I've been paying a lot of attention to the baby, and I've let our relationship take the backseat. But no matter what happens, or what it seems like, I love you more and more every day. I am so grateful to you for everything that you do for me, and for our family.
Today when I woke up, you were bringing groceries in. And as I was still staggering around, trying to wake up without waking the baby, you got together stuff for lunch that was delicious. And knowing how much I like fruits and vegetables, you brought home more produce than anything else.
I can't even begin to count the number of times lately that I've been up all night and you took charge of caring for the boy so that I could get a little sleep. I know that's been happening a lot lately as Nate goes through growth spurts and all he wants to do is eat and eat and eat all night long.
You put off studying this weekend so that we could spend time with my Dad and brother. Even though you needed to get homework done, I wanted to spend Spencer's birthday with him, so we all went to the movies. And you stayed up Sunday night until 4am getting all your homework and studying done. You work so hard to do well in all your classes so that you'll be able to get your degree and find a good job that will provide for our family.
We have known each other since we were 14 years old. And no one knows me better than you do. When I was going through the typical teenage girl's drama with my mom, you were always there to hold my hand, and give me a shoulder to cry on. And I had more fun just sitting on the front porch swing after school with you than I would think likely. We had classes together, and study times that were more socialization than studying. No matter what I thought, or what the little voice in my head said, you never let me think bad things about myself. I had real self-esteem issues, but you refused to let me think I was worthless. The day we met it was the first day of the new semester, and I was sitting at my desk in Spanish class, crying. You could have chosen any other seat in the room. But something made you stop, and not only did you sit next to me, you talked to me too. Helped me pull myself together enough to get through the class. Poor guy, you had no idea what you were getting yourself in for.
And all through high school, you were the constant in my ever changing life. And you perpetuated some of those changes yourself. I started going to Seminary. And I LOVED it. But at the same time, I didn't like it much because of the choices I was making. So you helped me try to make changes. And every time I fell back into my bad habits, you were disappointed, but you still liked me, and you still tried to help.
Fast forward to after your mission. You knew that I had gotten marred, had a child and that I was neck deep in my old bad habits. You knew that I had made some bad choices and I was in a crappy place in my life. When you found out that I had left Joel, you called me up, and we met to talk. Like old times. I remember little from that night. I remember that I was terrible to you, and I said horrible things to you. I tried to push you away because I was convinced that I was a terrible person and I didn't want to drag you down with me. As usual, you refused to give up on me, and you refused to share my view of myself as a terrible person, and lost cause.
Now we've been married a year and a half. We have a beautiful, sweet little boy who looks just like his Daddy. And I have never been happier. You still make my heart jump a little when you smile at me. I still feel safest when you're arms are around me. And even when I'm at my lowest, and I start to think I'm worthless again, you still make me smile and laugh. You still make me feel good about myself.
I promise that now and forever, I will love you. And that no matter what obstacles stand in our way, nothing will ever change that.

With a love that will never end, never diminish,

Rachel

Saturday, November 15, 2008

A Letter to Nate

My dear, sweet boy,

I wanted to take a minute out of our day to tell you that I love you. And I have loved you ever since your daddy and I found out that you were going to come join our family, almost a year ago. I have watched you grow, both prenatally, and in the short month you've been alive. And I have loved you the whole time. Even when you wake me up for the third time in an hour just to snack for five minutes and go back to sleep. And when I ask Daddy to hold you because you're making me crazy, it's because I don't want to lose my temper and raise my voice at you. It's not your fault that you cry. I know that's the only way you can verbally communicate. And while I'm getting more patience everyday, I still have a ways to go. But I still love you. I enjoy hearing your sweet coos and happy gurgles. I like making silly faces and monster faces with you. When you make happy faces at me, and I can see your milk stained tongue, it melts my heart; it makes me proud of myself for making you such good, yummy, Mommy Milk. I enjoy spending time with you, even if all we do is cuddle on the couch. You have grown and changed so much in such a short time. One month and a day ago you were born. You scored a 4 or 5 on your 1 minute APGAR. Your skin was pale white, you were in shock from the delivery, and you needed oxygen. 5 minutes later, you had gotten the oxygen you needed, your color was much better, you were crying, and you scored a 9 on your APGAR. You weighed 9 pounds, and 1.8 ounces. You were 20 inches tall. Yesterday you were one month old. Your beautiful eyes have changed from blue with some brown in them to all blue. I guess Grammy's and Grandpa Adams's light colored eye genes won out over Mommy and Daddy's brown eyes. At your well baby check up, you made happy faces at the doctor, and didn't pee on her this time. You squiggled and squirmed on the exam table, making it hard to see that you had grown to 23.25 inches tall, and 11 pounds, 7.5 ounces. You don't fit into the cute little outfit that you came home from the hospital in; as a matter of fact, your daddy dressed you in a 3month outfit earlier this week, and it fit!
And when I put you down for tummy time, please don't think I'm being mean. I know that I usually lay you with your head facing one way, then sit or lay on the opposite side of you. I'm not trying to frustrate you, I just want to encourage you to lift and turn your head. When you make it, I am so happy for you, and for the progress you're making. Tonight you even looked like you were trying to get your knees under yourself. That's one of the first steps towards crawling! I just want you to grow and develop, and be a happy boy.
This afternoon, when I was holding you, singing softly, you reached out and grabbed my finger. Your grip was so strong I had a hard time prying my finger out of your grasp. I hope that you will keep your strength. My hope for you is that you will be strong physically, mentally, strong of character, of will, and strong in your faith. I believe wholeheartedly that right now you have a recollection of the preexistance and that you're probably stronger in faith than I am because you can still remember what it was like to be in the presence of our Heavenly Father. As you grow, and as you forget what you used to know, it will be your daddy's and my responsibility to teach you what is required to return to live with Him, and with us, and your big brother again.
I will also try my best to tell you about your big brother. He was a sweet, sweet boy, and it makes my heart ache that you won't get a chance to meet him on Earth. I don't know if you met him before you came to us, but I suspect that you did.
It's not just me who loves you either. Your Aunt Suzanne, Grandpa, and Uncle Spencer all light up when they get to see you. Your Grammy, and Aunt Sara were so excited to come visit you, and they ask about you every chance you get. Everyone else who hasn't gotten to meet you yet, is anxiously awaiting their chance, and asking about you, asking for pictures of you, and telling me how cute and how sweet you look. There are people in this world who would walk through fire for you, who haven't even met you yet.
As for Daddy and me, we love you and we will do everything in our power to give you what you need and what you want to be a happy, healthy, spiritual, well adjusted, righteous, young man. It makes me happy to know that loud noises startle you. That shows me that you aren't exposed to lots of yelling. You know that your parents love you, and we love each other. I fully expect that you and your siblings will grow up in a home filled with love and happiness. A home where shouting and arguing are not the norm. That is my promise to you, my sweet boy.

With all the love my heart can hold,

Mommy

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Settling in

As is common in any new relationship, the past four weeks have been filled with discoveries. Nate, Dan and I have had to relate to each other, find what makes each of us tick, and find ways to peacefully coexist, while maintaining our three distinct personalities. Unfortunately for Nate, he has also had to adjust to a whole new strange world in which nourishment no longer flows directly into his stomach and he has to do things like breathing on his own.
As you might imagine, this has led to several differences of opinion between the three of us. Especially between Nathan and me. You see, Dan and I have been married and living together for a year and a half now; and we have known each other for almost nine years. Granted, that doesn't mean that we always see eye to eye, but we have a pretty good understanding of each other.
Nate and I, on the other hand, are not seeing eye to eye on much at the moment. This goes all the way back to his birth, and the time we spent in the hospital. He wanted to be held upright, perpendicular to the floor...he also wanted to nurse that way. I had no problem holding him, but when lunchtime rolled around, he got cradled in my arms, and started screaming. He also thought that in spite of his screaming, the milk should find its way into his mouth and down his throat without him having to actually nurse. Hunger eventually won out, and he tolerated being held parallel to the ground and nursing instead of crying. Score two for Mommy! But I lost my credibility before we even left the hospital. I think it was when I spent most of the night holding and rocking and singing to him, telling him that I would always be here, and that I wouldn't let anything hurt him. Then, early the next morning, I cheerfully handed him off to the nurse who took him to be circumcised.
Our differences of opinion continue. Nate did actually find a way to nurse sitting up, he wiggled and squirmed until, instead of being held up to my shoulder, being burped, he was latching on to continue his meal. Score one for Nate. We have, for the most part, figured out the whole eating process. Though he still doesn't seem to fully trust me. His latest game is continuing to nurse after he's full, holding as much milk as he can in his mouth, then smiling at me, turning his head and letting it all drool out of his mouth. Or eating until he makes himself sick, and spitting up on my shoulder in lieu of burping. It's as though he doesn't trust that the next time he's hungry, he'll be fed. Or maybe he thinks I wait too long to realize he's ready for a snack. But no matter how many times I tell him his tummy is full, he doesn't want to quit. And even though I know he's done, and that he's going to probably spit up on me-when he opens and closes his mouth like a little fish, and cries, squirming towards me, pleading with his eyes for just a little more milk before he wastes away-I fold, I fold like....um..like something easily folded. Score two for Nate.
We also disagree on whether or not he will self-destruct if he is left to languish in his swing or bassinet. Nate is of the opinion that if he is not being held, he should be lying next to one of his parents, being cuddled. He also seems to think that his bassinet is a vortex of evil and the only place he should ever be expected to sleep is on our bed. Personally, I think that he will survive being seated in his swing, or laid in his bassinet, or even put on the floor for some tummy time (actually, he's cool with tummy time). I believe that even if his bassinet is a vortex of evil, he is strong enough to prevail. And I believe that I'm sick of washing my bedding because a certain little guy is stuffing himself and spitting up all over my side of the bed!

My Kitchen...aka, the blender graveyard

So I've been doing a lot of preparing and freezing of veggies and whatnot lately. Apparently this is causing a bit of a strain on the blending/pureeing machines that live in my kitchen. The first to go was the wal-mart brand blender. The bottom of the pitcher part was plastic, so the continued heavy usage caused it to melt to the power base. That was awesome. Just as I was finishing with the yellow squash, I smelled the strange burning smell of melting plastic. So I turned to my backup magic bullet. And halfway through the carrots, the motor went out. So all of a sudden I've got 2 pounds of steamed carrots, 2 heads of cauliflower, and 4 bunches of broccoli and no way to do anything with them. At least I hadn't started cooking the sweet potatoes or butternut squashes yet. Thought I do have to admit to being very disappointed. Very Very disappointed. Dan and Ryan were all excited about the new World of Warcraft game version, Wrath of the Lich King, coming out tonight. They decided to head to Wal-Mart and stand in line to get their copies. So, Nate and I tagged along and I got me a shiny new blender. With a food processor attachment. Yay.
Wow, that kinda makes us seem lame. My big thing today was getting a new blender so that I could finish pureeing veggies, and my husband stood in line for an hour with his brother to get the newest version of his favorite video game. of course that's not all we did today. I was all excited because I got to go out, and I brought a purse instead of a diaper bag. A PURSE!!! Granted, it was to the dentists office, and he drilled away at two teeth. But I took a PURSE!! And later Suzanne watched the little guy for us while I took the big guy to urgent care. He has had an ear ache for the past 3 weeks, and today it hurt so bad that he didn't go to school. He had an appointment for Friday, but when I saw him lying in quiet pain on the couch, I decided we should go tonight. Turns out that not only is his ear all red and inflamed looking, he has a wax build up that makes is hard to even see the infected part. But, every cloud has a silver lining. That made the second time in one day that I left the house with a purse, a PURSE, and NO diaper bag!!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Anderson family updates

Well, it's been four awesome, fun filled weeks. And Nate is growing so much every day. Today I weighed myself holding him, then just me. And according to my bathroom scale, he weighs 11.6 pounds!!! How crazy is that? His one month check up is on Friday (a whole month old!!!) so I guess I'll see how accurate my scale is then. So, as for the life of the Andersons, Dan is still focusing on his school stuff. He's got a huge Bio project/test thingy next week. It's hugely study intensive, but not a lot of points. The teacher is kind of a butt head. He seems to like making his class hard for the sake of it being difficult. So, we've been seeing lots and lots of flashcards around here lately.
I have been a flurry of cooking activity. Since Frys was having such an awesome sale of chicken and roasts I stocked up. Over the course of 48 hours I made up like 8lbs of chicken nuggets, cut up two roasts for stew meat and fajita meat, repackaged and froze the remaining, roasted a whole chicken, pureed carrots, made a really yummy butternut squash soup, and made and froze some breakfast burritos. All while caring for a small child. He is the sweetest little baby. I absolutely love him. Not as crazy about his vision of me as primarily a human milk machine. But I love watching him in everything he does. From sleeping, to eating, to cuddling (usually with his food source!), even the confused look he gets right before he spits up, and the concerned look he get afterwards. It's as if he's calculating the nourishment he's lost via spit up; deciding whether or not he can spare it. I guess he figures he can't because he usually eats again right afterwards.
Nate is doing well. He has, however, decided that bassinets are for babies, and he is not a baby. Mommy and Daddy's bed is the resting place of choice for my little man. I've got to say, watching a little, almost one month old boy napping in the middle of a king sized bed is really amusing. He's doing well with tummy time and he can push himself up enough to go from laying on his tummy facing right to laying on his tummy facing left. Unfortunately, he really likes being on his tummy, and finds it relaxing enough that he tends to fall asleep. And with the whole "Always lay your baby on their back to sleep, or they will die of SIDS" train of thought currently being pushed by pediatricians, combined with my own unusually high level of paranoia regarding infant mortality, it kinda freaks me out. Dan actually came into the room one afternoon to comfort the crying baby and saw me, hovering over him, smiling. You see, he had been sleeping peacefully (on his back). So peacefully that I was worried that he wasn't breathing. So I watched him intently, then convinced myself that I was imagining the rhythmic rising and falling of his chest, so I pinched him to see if I could get a reaction. And Dan and I had a conversation about not letting irrational paranoia interfere with nap time.
All in all, we're doing pretty good. This week promises to be a busy one. What with my dental appointment, (actually kinda looking forward to fillings b/c I get to get out of the house without lugging a diaper bag, infant carrier, stroller, and infant), Nate's doctor's appointment, Spencer's 15th birthday on Saturday (my baby brother :( he's getting so big) it's gonna be crazy!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Modern day Persecution

On the plus side, our Prophet isn't being tarred and feathered. However, a campaign of intimidation, ridicule, and mockery of church members in general is in action. I cannot believe the fallout for the Church over the passage of proposition 8 in California. The Pattersons, an LDS family that donated a large sum from their life savings, has been ridiculed relentlessly. One blogger asks mockingly"what's the bigger threat to their children, people getting married, or being broke?" I say, honestly, that the bigger threat is not people getting married, but people marrying others of the same gender. Not necessarily because of the choices of the individuals involved, but because the adversary has a more insidious plan. If that had passed, public schools would have to teach that an aberrant lifestyle is normal, and that deviant behavior is not only acceptable, but encouraged. Look at what's going on in Massachusetts. A doctor who, as a result of his moral feelings on the subject, felt uncomfortable assisting a lesbian couple in the process of insemination, referring them to a trusted colleague (his partner, in fact) was sued for discrimination. Successfully. During the proceedings, the judge even suggested to the doctor that he may want to consider a change of profession. A faith based orphanage (run by the Catholic Church) closed their doors rather than be forced to allow people who violate a basic tennent of their faith to adopt from their agency. Schoolchildren are being read books featuring families headed by two men or two women, and fairy tales in which a prince marries another prince after slaying the dragon. So, I ask you, what is the greater threat? The corruption of your children's education, the loss of your rights to assert yourself in your beliefs, the earlier loss of innocence (the children's teachings on 'diversity' and 'acceptance' begin in kindergarten, when most are only 5 years old)...or the loss of money that you had set aside for a rainy day? I've got to say, in this situation, the clouds are defiantly rolling in.

And now this nonsense about boycotting Utah. Claims are being made by those who opposed Prop 8 that the LDS church spearheaded the proposition, and that the "Mormons" snuck in and stole the election away from Californians who wanted to shoot the prop down. That's silly. Even if the Church wanted to influence the election and turn it against gay unions, the people of California: Mormon, Catholic, Presbyterian, Lutheran, Baptist, Atheist, Agnostic, Episcopalian, Protestant, Jewish, etc. are the ones who actually walked into the polling places and cast their vote. Why are we the ones being reviled? Why not boycott California? They're the ones who did it. Why are angry people lined up outside the LA Temple, shouting at members who are trying to attend a session? I love going to the Temple, it is a very special, very spiritual place. And I honestly think that if I was being yelled at, I might just cry.

What I think is absolutely disgusting though, is the crass and abusive television ad that was aired. It featured two young men wearing white shirts, ties and suits with nametags labeling them as missionaries for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. In this ad, the two young men force their way into the home of a 'married' lesbian couple (error number 1:Elders don't go into women's homes without another man being present) and proceed to destroy it. They throw things around, knock stuff over, and forcibly rip the women's wedding rings from their hands as the couple cries "what about our rights? We have rights" to which the young men reply "Not if we have anything to say about it" in a snarl. The young men proceed to tear through the home until they find and destroy the couple's marriage license.

I for one am happy that the people of California took the stand that they did. I just wish that certain others would admit that it was the choice of the people, and that no one was forced, coerced or brainwashed into doing it. And that to blame that State of Utah is ludicrous.